Gaiden Mock Round

[grimgrinningghosts]

[ You wake up in what might be the single worst place to wake up if you didn’t go to sleep there: sprawled across a row of airport terminal chairs. Oh, there’s probably a major pain in your back that might last a while. Do you even remember going to sleep in the first place?

The standard airport loudspeaker buzz is being piped in, but this is clearly not a real airport: the glass that would usually have airplanes behind it is no glass at all - it’s a massive (and kind of cheap-looking) matte painting. If you pay attention to the announcements too, they seem to be more like a bad stand-up impression of airport announcements than real ones. “The white zones are for schmoozing only” - really?

There are also, notably, no other living travelers in this airport. It’s just you guys, confusion, and a lot of painted cutout images of laughing people. If you do a lot of Earthly plane traveling, you might recognize what this place is supposed to look like - Los Angeles International Airport.And if you don’t, LAX is certainly what they’ve decided to stamp on everything - especially the plastic replica baggage in the comically fake replica baggage claim.

You might know where you’re supposed to think you are, but you have no idea how you got here.

Eventually, though, someone else speaks through the loudspeaker! And appears on all the TV screens. And the joke arrival/departure screen.

Oh no. ]

Superstars! It’s me, your agent! Kiss kiss, hello hello! Sharpay, love the outfit. Sadness, lookin’ down and out as ever. You’re all looking so, uh, “on point,” as the kids say. Welcome to Los Angeles, City of Angels and Home of the Stars! Like you! Now we got a schedule to keep, so move your sorry butts out to Bel-Air to the mansion, alright? We gotta get you ready for your date with Hollywood, and she is NOT a dame you wanna keep waiting! Though of course, as we say out here, “fashionably late” is encouraged, so on second thought you know what? Go ahead and take ya time. See the sights! Grab a coffee! Listen, I got Brad Pitt on the other line here, so ciao, babes, love you all, see you at the mansion! Mwah!

[ … well. At least you know the creepy robot face of maybe your kidnapper? Maybe chat with one of the other people here about it? There’s also certainly a front door, the building is hardly locked up.

If you do decide to take your leave of the airport, which is understandable, you’ll end up on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, or at least a similarly creepy and cheap replica of it. If you look at the stars, you might recognize the names. There are plenty of places to check out, but there are no exits - the edges of the area are surrounded by false storefronts. Looks like you might be in “Los Angeles” for the long haul. ]

[ Let’s talk about your locations, though, very briefly. The only place for 24-hour food is Starslurps Cafe, they have coffee and pastries and The Worst Name, and whatever you want you can just kind of take because the barista is a cardboard cutout that just kind of says “FOR YOU, IT’S ON THE HOUSE” every time you trip a motion sensor. Fur Sure is where you can get more clothes beyond the ones on your backs, but they’re all very fancy and there are So Many fur coats. The Psychic Fax Center features an ornate seance room complete with crystal ball and tarot cards, but also there’s a very 90s fax machine collecting dust in the corner. Tattoo on You is a tattoo parlor, in case you want a souvenir? It would probably help if there was anyone to run the machines.

Superstar Studios is closed and locked up tight. Gotta wait for your cue, it looks like.

Beethoven Bowling is a pretty standard bowling alley, with automatic lanes and all the cardboardy pizza and lukewarm hot dogs you can eat. The Cobra Cabana opens at 6pm, and is a fully-stocked bar with a jungle theme. The only food they serve is chips and salsa for some reason. Laughter Shocks is a comedy club, but the only comedy playing is a 24-hour loop of bad Tim Allen stand-up. Then, finally, there’s the mansion you’re all staying at, with bedrooms enough for everyone and all kinds of over-decorated rooms. It comes with a swimming pool and its own full-size Aztec Temple in the backyard. Don’t worry about it, babe, it’s just Bel-Air living. ]

Comments

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

[Well, that was all very... it was something to be sure. Eclipsa has some trouble remembering where she is when she wakes up in the morning. Well, morning is a bit generous, she's up around noon. She spends a moment feeling at the side of her bed in a bit of a panic. First for her husband, before she remembers the time. Then she feels for her chocolate stash, before she remembers the place.

How troublesome.

So its at one o'clock when Eclipsa, still decked out from some jammies she's knicked from the mansion, is grabbing a coffee and some breakfast at Starslumps. Just chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool.

After following that up with cleaning up and new clothes, Eclipsa stops by Tattoo For You, skimming through the options.] Ooohhhhh, that one's cute. [Looking at a skull with blood pouring out of the eyes.

The majority of the rest of the day is spent kind of imitating Rod's actions the previous day, observing everyone from a distance. She seems to be writing down some notes to herself throughout as well. Its pretty suspicious, all in all.

In the evening? Oh you know she's drinking away with posh style in the Cobra Cabana. She'll wave anyone down who happens to be passing by.] Yoohooooo, darling~ Come, come, join me, relax a little!

staredown

[mostwantedfrog]

[Constantine is used to being stared at. It comes with the territory of being an infamous criminal mastermind. And also a puppet frog. Usually he appreciates the attention, but right now, so soon after beginning his completely-foolproof plot to pose as Kermit the frog, it's a little worrisome.

What does she know? Does she suspect? Has she seen through his disguise?

All in all, it's enough for Constantine to attempt a little snooping himself. The next time Eclipsa loses sight of him, Constantine tries to sneak around and stealthily approach Eclipsa from behind, aiming to get a look at exactly what she's writing.

How stealthy is he, you ask? On the one hand, Constantine is a criminal mastermind capable of breaking into multiple infamous high-security buildings and stealing their artifacts.

On the other hand, the puppeteer that no one acknowledges carrying him around is not capable of any of those things.]

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

[Eclipsa's a pretty shrewd beast and is generally pretty good at noticing the things others miss. Yet on the other hand, watching a puppet flail around is endlessly funny to behold.

She'll just. Watch this unfold at first.]

[mostwantedfrog]

[Constantine spends a few minutes slowly inching closer to her, occasionally pressing his back to the wall of the nearest store, or trying to look like he's nonchalantly looking in a window if he thinks she's glancing his way. Aaaaand now he's crawling on the ground. The puppeteer, clearly, is also crawling on the ground. They're 50ft away from Eclipsa at this point.

Stealthy.]

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

[So impressive. Much stealthy. Wow.

She puts on a show of casually yawning, leaving the notebook on more clear display for anyone that gets close enough....]

Starslumps

[kindofadrag]

[Hey, speaking of slumps, Sadness is slumped in a nearby chair, staring despondently at her hot cocoa.]

It was too hot, but then I let it sit too long, and now it's too cold.

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

[Goodness that's a glum little thing, isn't she.] Oh, that can be a struggle, dear. Happens to everyone. Perhaps we could heat it up? Or perhaps get you another.

[kindofadrag]

[Sadness' expression turns even more dour at the idea of going back up to the counter.]

I really shouldn't bother them, they're busy.

[They are literally the only two people here.]

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

I'm not. I'd be happy to help, if you so desire.

Cobra Cabana

[noweenies]

[Dawn had been bravely exploring through, and the Cobra Cabana had caught her eye. She's peering at it curiously when Eclipsa notices her, and she straightens up immediately.]

Is it okay for me to be someplace like this? [Dawn's normally pretty brave, but she does want to make a good impression for one of the few adults around here. Can't have word getting back that a member of the Babysitter's club is hanging around somewhere like this!]

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

Probably! [She waves a hand idly.] Besides, there's no one around to enforce the rules if it isn't allowed. And the rules we've been given don't particularly seem to come from a kind source. Wouldn't you agree?

[noweenies]

[She looks like she might protest, but there's mention of the rules, and Dawn's sunny disposition seems to dampen a little.]

They were just trying to scare us. I'm not afraid of them.

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

Then pull up a chair and live a little, dearie. No harm, no foul.

[She's just... advocating children to drink now, apparently.]

tattoos

[orwellgirl]

Oh, that's majorly cute! [just scoping out that shit from behind ya] Y'know, I always wanted a little something like that for my back-- I wear a lot of crop tops. But, I think I've blown up every planet with a decent tattoo artist for about twelve galaxies? Oops!

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

[...alright that's. That's a lot of casual admission of violence already. Even if Eclipsa's the so-called Queen of Darkness. Still, she's... relatively good at covering up emotions so let's just. Brush past that.]

A-ah, so's the way the cookie crumbles from time to time. I used to know a delightful little candy store that made these delicious hand-made chocolates. Any shape you desired. Then a few hundred years pass and poof! Gone. Shame.

[orwellgirl]

Isn't it? Nobody ever really brings up the negatives of villainy! Probably because there's just so many positives. Like, so many.

[... wait.]

You look really good for a ridiculously old person. What face mask do you use?

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

I'm... sure there's a few ideas out there. Morality and decent or some such kind of thing.

[Oh good a distraction.]

Just a little magic ice freeze. Does wonders for the pores but it really gives you a craving for some chocolate.

tattoos

[feudalladyshandmaid]

[Cassandra, who can't help overhearing, slides by and gives the tattoo a glance.]

Hmm, yeah, that would be something I'd get. But if I did, I'd want something that would definitely make my enemies scared.

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

Really? It'd have to be in a very visible spot on you then, wouldn't it?

[feudalladyshandmaid]

Yeah, if it's something like that. But maybe something smaller, that would go on my knuckles, you know?

[She cracks them for effect. She can already picture it in her minds eye.]

stare

[southgatekept]

[ Rather practiced at this kind of activity, Lopmon at one point meets Eclipsa's gaze and just stares back. Neutral-faced, head slightly tilted.

It was her job to just stand and guard a gate for most of her life, she's got this. ]

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

[Huh. Weird. She just waggles her fingers at Lopmon pleasantly, then.]

[southgatekept]

[ They're probably like...across the street from each other, or something. Lopmon similarly raises a finger, though hers are incredibly small, little stubby things on her paws. ]

Tattoos

[maglevsbian]

Hm. You've got good taste.

[Was that a smile? That's a smile alright. Gogo nods and crosses her arms next to the older lady.]

Could look better. You ink?

[Any other time she couldn't possibly fanthom someone with quite a style getting a tattoo, but hey! This is a weird situation and might as well make the best of it.]

[allknowledgegoodknowledge]

Oh, I've always considered it, but never found anything that really felt quite me.