Week 6

[grimgrinningghosts]

[. . . Well last week sure was a bloodbath. A bloody, accidental bloodbath. Even with two groups trying to save you, it might start to feel doubtful that you'll ever get out of here alive. Not to mention that Randy almost killed you all on an angry whim and you're still stuck in this madhouse with him of all people.

But hey, there's a silver lining to every cloud! You get a new floor that's not a nightmarish deathscape! Aren't you glad?

18 people remain]

[SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY]

[Don't forget to fill in this week's AC!]

Comments

[faciliheir]

[why are we talking in a whisper that sounds dumb]

WOW, GASTON, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE ACCUSING LEIA OF LYING ABOUT BEING A GENERAL!

[see isn't shouting so much more fun]

[athleticallyinclined]

[ He was trying to spare your feelings, Freddie!!

But fine then. He just rolls his eyes. ]

She may think she is.

[ The elderly do have a tendency towards delusion, after all... ]

But it's not true.

[hasit]

[oh hey she sure did hear her name being helpfully shouted by Freddie

thanks, Freddie!

Leia comes over to stand at Gaston's shoulder, which she barely matches in height, hands tucked behind her back.]

That sounded an awful lot like a subordinate questioning the authority of his superior, Captain.

[faciliheir]

[smiles like the innocent lamb of god she is]

[athleticallyinclined]

[ thanks freddie ]

[athleticallyinclined]

[ And here she is. Gaston looks down, and down, and raises his eyebrows innocently. ]

Would I do something like that, uh, General?

[ If he knew what airquotes were... ]

[hasit]

You're doing it as we speak. And truth be told, if there was a brig here I'd have you thrown in it for insubordination.

[you little shit]

[athleticallyinclined]

Yes, yes, of course you would.

[ He glances sideways at Freddie and winks before looking back at Leia. ]

With your whole army behind you, is that right?

[hasit]

[No hesitation:]

Yes, as a matter of fact. Believe me, or don't, Gaston, but the truth remains that I've got a lifetime of leadership experience under my belt.

[athleticallyinclined]

[ Is everyone in on this joke but him? What's going on here? He blusters for a moment. ]

...You can't be a General.

[ Let's just go ahead and jump right in this hole he's been digging, why don't we. ]

You're a woman!

[hasit]

[slow. clap.]

Took you long enough to notice. Fortunately, in my galaxy, we're not so afraid a woman will bleed all over us that we keep her from positions of leadership.

[athleticallyinclined]

But that's the point! Men go to war. Women stay home where it's safe, and they never have to worry about bleeding a day in their lives!

[ No one tell him, he will 100% pass out. ]

[hasit]

In my galaxy, nobody's safe. I keep them safe.

[Or, at least, she tries her goddamn hardest.]

Me. A woman. A General.

[athleticallyinclined]

[ Is she...telling the truth? Or just completely, hopelessly delusional? In either case, the correct reaction is the same. He puts a hand on her shoulder and looks deeply into her eyes. ]

And that is something you should never have had to do.

[ He shakes his head solemnly. ]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[hasit]

[She doesn't break eye contact; merely grabs his wrist with her other hand and wrenches it back as hard as she can.]

Touch me again and I'll take your hand next time.

[athleticallyinclined]

[ He winces horribly, but somehow manages to bite back a groan of pain. ]

I know you must be - grieving - but this is not the way to express it!

[hasit]

What—I'm sorry, what am I meant to be grieving, exactly?

[She's satisfied enough by that wince that she lets his wrist go, arms folding in front of her chest.]

[athleticallyinclined]

[ He's just going to hastily hide his hands behind his back where she can't reach them. And then blink at her in painfully innocent confusion. ]

Why - the death of all the men in your - Galaxy, was it?

[ Odd name for a - town? Country? It doesn't matter. His voice is surprisingly gentle as he continues. ]

That's why you're a general, isn't it? Because there's no one left to protect you?

[hasit]

[She's never wanted so badly to wring someone's neck with her bare hands, but that would undo quite a lot of progress, wouldn't it? Even with Freddie watching, who she's almost certain would help cover for her, it's just that Gaston isn't worth it. Plain and simple.

Her teeth grit, she leans in, getting as close to his face as she can with the rather large height difference between them.]

I don't need anyone to protect me. If I was the last woman in my galaxy, I'd still be in charge, because I'm damn good at what I do!

[athleticallyinclined]

[ He still remembers that punch, and leans back a bit when she leans forward, trying to keep out of arm's reach.

But he's nodding along with her as she snaps at him. Poor thing. Grief does manifest itself in strange ways, doesn't it? ]

If you were the last woman, yes. I'm sure.

[ Because. All the men are dead, so then she'd be the only one left, right? ]

[hasit]

You—

[Leia's nostrils flare, and she's visibly restraining herself from giving him another pop in the jaw, but she exhales through her gritted teeth and steps away, pinching the bridge of her nose.]

—are the absolute worst.

[athleticallyinclined]

[ ...best, right? She must have said "best." He must have just misheard it.

Or perhaps she'd just gotten confused, addled in her old age, and used the wrong word, and Gaston's hearing is as perfect as ever. Yes, that's much more likely. Best not to mention it. Instead, he bows graciously. ]

Only doing my duty as a soldier and a gentleman.

[hasit]

....Whatever you say, Gaston.

[Is he really stupider than she'd thought? Is he being willfully ignorant?

Whatever the case, she has better things to do than stand around here and let herself be insulted and belittled. Not today, Satan.]