foolishmortals | ENDGAME GROUP 2: The most tragic place on earth (Log 1)

ENDGAME GROUP 2: The most tragic place on earth (Log 1)

[Thanks to Hades’ help, group 2 suddenly arrives in Main Street, or… what was Main Street. Now it’s a desolate wasteland barely masquerading as a cheerful theme park. You are outside the ticket gate right now, but from the gray sky and a sign proudly displaying: “Dismaland: Bemusement Park”, it wouldn’t take much to remember that the villains have a hold on the pocket dimension now.

Rod, meanwhile, is holding a bag, looking as determined as ever.]

First of all, I'm going to come forward in saying that we have to be careful about this mission, and we have to make sure we aren’t seen. If Hades is right, the moment either Bill or Randy know we’re here, it’s all over for us. As such I took the liberty of going through the hotel’s coat check to find some disguises.

[He drops a bag on the floor and out spill tacky Hawaiian t-shirts, sunglasses, and really tacky straw hats. Rod is already quickly putting on a t shirt and pair of sunglasses.]

If you have any questions I’d suggest you ask them now. If there is any chance of us separating I don’t want anyone ending up lost in the dark while we explore.

(ooc: This is the first group 2 log!)

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[Eye roll.]

At least I have my glasses. And not a split lip.

[WHATEVER STAN]

[Fine if you're gonna be a nerd he's gonna wander off and look at the tacky tapestries.

Let me guess, the eye follows him.]

[It does! Spooky, right?]

[Yep! Hate that! Also unsurprised by that.

What's the price tag on this bitch?]

[50 Dismal Dollars.]

[...Where did you get a pen from, Stan--

Oh, he's just turning that 0 into an 8 and then writing "008" after it.]

Hehehe.

[What other terrifying merch do we got.]

[Deer teeth on necklaces. Also Grunkle Ford bobbleheada! The voicebox says “I AM AN IDIOT” when the head is bopped.]

[...

Does the bobblehead look like it has a camera in it, when he picks it up and looks it over.]

[Nope!]

[Ok cool he's gonna bop it a couple of times, snicker a little bit, and move on.]

..............

[HE'S NOT SURE WHAT ELSE HE EXPECTED]

Hey! You're the one with the journal stuff, right? I've heard of you from your family.

[It's the goat guy! And he has a few things on him he thinks Ford might be interested in]

[Fiddleford looks at this guy that looks like everything he ever assumed demons were supposed to look like and utterly fails to be upset about it. Apparently actual demons are shaped like basic geometric figures and, anyway, there are bigger fish to fry in this shitpit of a park. (Plus also he knows from the televisions that Lekmet is a dad, and dads gotta stick together.)

Now that's character development.]

Y'know when all this is over I'd like to take a look at that collar.

Oh!! I have a spare one if you'd like to take a look! I'm not really sure what kind of magic or science its got, but it's nice it's able to let me speak.

[TEAM DADS! he's just gonna...procure the extra collar from his bag and hand it over.]

[This is how you make friends with a Fiddleford, you give him a Science Present. Not that he's not still very much keeping an ear out for anything that sounds even a little bit like approaching Enemies, but he's spent a long time spinning his wheels in limbo and anything that can get him back up to running at full capacity is good.]

Me either! That's why I've been wantin' to get hold of one.

[He turns it over in his hands couple times.]

I figure it's probably somethin' to do with brainwaves, but if it is it doesn't make any sense for it to go 'round the neck. Just seems like a flaw in the design. Unless it intercepts electrical impulses from the brain on the way to the vocal chords?

There's this kid- one of my kids whose pretty good at building stuff. You two ought to meet sometime when all this is over!

[Lekmet's main dimensions are fairly...medieval, but he's read up a thing or two in the Manor's library! Aaaand mingling with fellow guests.]

I've read somewhere when you think a phrase, your vocal chords move along like you're talking. [Nailed it] Something like that?
My creator put some dumb curse on me when I came to exist, there used to be very few who could understand through all the annoying goat sounds. He created me to die but that's-- A whole other can of worms.

[Glossaryck is a punk bich and goatdad's forever bitter about it]

[Oh #yikes buddy]

Well I'm, ah. Glad you didn't?

[There were some near misses there, he knows from watching. You're very lucky, mister 'I'll just misvote for the duck'.]

Could be that, though then that'd beg the question why all your thoughts aren't gettin' broadcast. Unless they are? But I figure that'd be more trouble than it'd be worth.

[ITS FINE...THEY're getting along somehow and neither of them are brawling yet]

I think so- Aside from being able to talk and present evidence stuff, I've been told I'm way too talkative.

[Don't think weird thoughts, don't think weird thoughts- ~~Penis~~ ...Okay so that didn't broadcast, which is good!]

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah. It would be really weird.

[What did that guy say about furries earlier-- STOP THINKING ABOUT DICKS]

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terribibble - 2018-03-15 00:16 (UTC) - Expand

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angelgoatdemon - 2018-03-15 02:36 (UTC) - Expand

Uh—

[ah! the goatman!]

Yes, that's me. Ford Pines. And you're...Lekmet? Yes?

That's me! Uh- There's a bunch of stuff I gotta give away and--

[Lekmet brings out an Enchanted Book along with a strange pair of scissors]

Apparently this book can take you wherever you want when you hold it, as long as it's somewhere not restricted by whatever magic that kept us imprisoned.

And these scissors open portals. It's safe, I've used it plenty of times! Something tells me you might need it.

[smh 30 years too late, lekmet]

Oh!

[He wasn't expecting gifts, let alone from a complete stranger; he accepts the book and the scissors with a baffled look on his face, too confused even to properly appreciate the power of those items.]

I appreciate it very much, but—why me? You don't know me from Moses.

Who the heck is Moses?

...But anyway, you and your-- husband, right?-- seem like the bookish types and the most responsible out of everyone here. No offense to Rod.

The scissors are just for your convenience, I can get another pair real easily. I believe I've heard of you in the multiverse out there.

—Irrelevant, at this point.

[Ford nods, smiling, and gives a grateful little laugh.]

They'll certainly come in handy, that's for sure. But—truly?

[gross don't stroke his ego]

Perhaps you saw one of my many wanted posters.

That must be it! I knew I'd seen you around somewhere. Those posters were scarce in all dimensions I frequently travel to.

I vaguely remember telling one of your family members I'd gift a pair to you. Usually it's my colleague who forges dimensional scissors, she won't mind since you've earned it!

[He may be growing really old and senile with his questionable memory, but old Magic High Commission duties still kicked in some way]

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sixfingeredstan - 2018-03-15 13:46 (UTC) - Expand

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