foolishmortals | this trial wasnt nearly bad enough for sad song lyrics

this trial wasnt nearly bad enough for sad song lyrics

[ A while after... All That, Beth puts together a. Party? Like objectively, this is a party.There's no music, which is a bummer, and no real decorations, but this is a fair shot at a party. In the Lobby, so there's no real getting around it, but if people want to just go back to their rooms she's not gonna judge them.

Audrey is contributing some ART, Penny contributed a veggie tray, there are some hot dogs and corn dogs run over from the Hot Dog Place, and beyond that there's... salad. So much salad. An unreasonable amount of butter lettuce salad with different dressings. Nothing (personally) fried, and nothing that requires anyone to spend too much time in the kitchen. Because like... screw that?

Anyway, welcome to the first afterparty. Aren't you glad you didn't leave it in the hands of a total shitpost? ]

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[Otis is here and eating salad for a while before he disappears into the kitchen.

He's got a weird contraption that seems to involve a balloon taped onto a bottle? Honestly, he'd build a moonshine still if he had the parts but this is gonna have to do. We all need to get wasted.]

Do you want to talk about it?

Because I don't. I really don't. But I feel like I should ask.

Yeah, deeeeefinitely not. Like, this isn't the worst thing that's ever happened to me? But also my life is a lie.

Being kidnapped into a murder game where 3 people have died and we don't even get to live in luxury isn't the worst thing for you? Are you from a shitty teen dystopia novel or something?

Once, a bunch of cows kidnapped me and almost turned me into steak so like. On a scale from 1 to 10 this is only like a 9 and every time someone tries to eat me is definitely a 10.

[He's saying vore ranks above murder.]

Edited 2018-06-18 00:27 (UTC)

Okay, fair. That sounds traumatic- were they like cultists or something?

Oh yeah, total cultists. They thought I was a "Sun Cow" [He does air quotes.] because I got stung by a bee and it looked like I had a fifth teat.

[But they were nice up until they tried to sacrifice him!]

It's a tie between you and Fizzy for most confusing and confronting alternate universe.

The red human hasn't ever seen a tree and I'm pretty sure she was raised in a cult.

[So, like. He's just saying? Audrey wins over him.]

Never met her. Doesn't count. Trees are overrated anyway.

(no subject)

udderly - 2018-06-18 03:19 (UTC) - Expand

Are you- ...is that. Some kind of science project?

[Is this really the time.]

I mean- sorry, I was going to ask how you were.

I'm - well, "fine" is definitely a lie, but "okay" isn't. [He gestures at his Creation.] This is just prep for later, honestly. If this keeps going on, I'm going to need it.

I see...

[She looks at it a little more closely.]

...it's some kind of bomb in case we have to fight our way out.

. . . I mean. I guess if you were really hard up, you could use it like that? [???] But nah, this is just the start of alcohol.

Oh! Oh. I see, sorry. I didn't know you could just- make it like this, in a normal kitchen.

...and don't worry. About the other thing. A molotov cocktail isn't really that powerful of an explosive, it's more about just spreading fire.

[Unless someone had some kind of magic science wand to make the alcohol more volatile somehow, but what are the odds of that.]

[Also that's probably not actually that comforting, oops.]

. . . Oh. Good to know. [This human is so weird? So weird.] I mean - I have an explosive. Or, well. Something that is explosive.

[ It seems Fizzy's going to ask him the usual question of if he's alright but. Well, she blinks for a few moments. ]

What's that, Otis?

If things keep going this way, we're all going to need alcohol. Well, Bojack and I are going to. [He gestures at it.] Honestly it's just in case of emergency.

[ ...Does Ponyland have alcohol. Oh god- whatever she's learned about it since coming here if not. ]

And...you can make it with this? You must be really smart and creative.

Nah. It's super easy, you just dump a bunch of yeast into water with honey and a few weeks later, you have mead. [The balloon is for gas release. If we were wondering.] Everyone on the farm knows how to make alcohol.

...That all sounds complicated to me. I don't think I could do it.

That's okay. Not everybody is good at everything - or anything, for that matter. Sometimes people are useless, and that's okay.

Oh... Well, I don't think I'm useless...

Oh - I'm not saying you are! I'm just saying some people are and you just gotta do what you can to help them.

Oh. ...It just sounds like something someone would say.