THE MOCK WEEK

[grimgrinningghosts]

[You find yourself waking in a large dressing room, incredibly spacious, but in intense disarray. The bed is comfortable enough, and each room seems to be equipped with a working bathroom and shower, so it's at least livable. But aesthetically, the place has hit the floor.

The horrifying clock mounted on the wall reads 9 am. After enough searching, you'll find a large tourist-y map of the studio on one of the dressers. An ominous note attached to the map with a paperclip reads "12PM WAITING AREA". It's not like you have any choice in the matter, seeing as there doesn't seem to be any way out.

Upon exiting the dressing room, you note a crooked star attached to the door bearing your name. There are 24 others like this, bearing names that you may or may not recognize. A quick tour around the studio reveals it to be in a similar state of disrepair, but something doesn't sit...right with you. Though the place is certainly creepy, you get strange vibes as you explore the building. As you move about the dust-filled halls of the abandoned building, you may spot movement out of the corner of your eye, or hear strange noises from behind you. It's nothing to be worried about, though...right?

At the very least, you'll find some comfort. The projection room and attached theater still seem to be in working order, though you'll have to manually grab one of the reels off the wall and start the thing yourself. In addition, the waiting area and lounge are both filled with reading materials, and the later features a large stage and a microphone. The commissary seems to replenish itself with food whenever you take your eyes off of it, ensuring that we won't be going hungry anytime soon. There are also cabinets full of ingredients and a small kitchen should you not trust whatever your benefactor is placing out for you.

Fortunately for them, the smaller individuals amongst your party won't find a great deal of difficulty moving around. Though their beds remain oversized, there seem to be appropriately-sized staircases and escalators placed about in appropriate spots, so as to make their lives easier. After all, they can't just keep relying on the others to get up to the cabinets and such, can they?

While you're waiting to find out what the deal here is, you might as well come out and socialize.]

(ooc: Welcome to the Foolish Mortals Mock Week! Please follow us on Plurk at foolishmortals for updates, and if you're so inclined, please feel free to join your Discord-inept head moderator as he struggles to set up a Discord chat up for everyone.)

Comments

12 PM, Waiting Area

[notjustanytoon]

[Never let it be said that the Judge is not punctual. For as soon as the clock strikes 12, an obnoxious looking group of characters appear from a door that wasn't there before - and certainly isn't there in a few minutes. They each have cartoon weapons, and form a tight circle around the shadowy figure walking in after them. They stand guard to protect the new arrival, and one of them speaks.]

All rise, all rise! De dishonorable Judge Doom of DOOMTown presiding!

[Judge Doom is a shadowy figure, clad in black, whose cape flows behind him even with the absence of wind. He carries a cane with a skull top - almost going out of his way to be extra.

But more importantly...there's something about him that looks off. You're not really sure what it is. Maybe it's because even for the elderly and inhuman among you, your skin looks so much more colorful and flawless compared to his. It's like staring right into the Uncanny Valley - something about him doesn't sit right with you, and you're not really sure what it is. It's like watching the Polar Express. He almost looks right, but something about him seems a bit creepy, besides the dark attire.

He glances across the room behind a pair of dark glasses, and speaks.]

Each of you has been found guilty of a crime. Whatever your crime may be, each of you have been placed under my watch. Thus, your stay here shall be an indefinite one. However, there is one thing that will cause me to adjudicate your sentence.

[Doom smirks.]

If you murder one of your peers, and manage to get away with it, you shall be allowed to leave. Perhaps you shall even be rewarded. Something to help alleviate your guilty conscience.

[exclamationpoint]

[raises his fucking hand because he's a good student]

Um, sir?

[wannagetsmote]

[Doesn't raise his hand because he's not a good fucking student Meet him outside for a wedgie, Troy.]

How about no.

[worldstiniestviolin]

[...what?]

You wish us to murder

[tonewlengths]

[From where she's been hiding, the worst student absolutely freaks out and shrieks, throwing a candelabra at the man and running to hide behind the nearest other person, sorry whoever is closest to her. Look she doesn't trust anybody right now, but other people aren't ominous skull adorned potential cannibals.]

[doesntdomuch]

[Perry is going to walk a little closer to him and scowl at Doom. Sure, he's guarded, but like heck is he not going to prove that he's not afraid of him.

He's not going to attack yet, but he swears if he tries anything...]

[hatesgreat]

RAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

[Lord Hater yells in outrage, flipping over a table or the nearest equivalent. This is about when he would be summoning up some lightning bolts to start shooting at people, or at the very least getting some electricity going around his fists, but he's too busy throwing a fit to notice that isn't actually happening.]

YOU DARE IMPRISON LORD HATER, GREATEST IN THE GALAXY?! I WILL DESTROY YOU!

[ilovepuppies]

[wait this isn't fun anymore

Star racks her brain for anything (recent) she may have done to get herself put away indefinitely. Was this some kind of off-shoot of St. Olga's? OH NO, it is, isn't it? She's been caught, for real this time? SHE'S DOOMED!]

Ohhhhh no no no nononononono- [Star's voice cracks as she tries to keep her cool] HEY! Mister, uh, Judge Doomy guy! I think there's been just a teensy mistake...!

[This is followed by the most forced innocent smile she can muster.]

[pinkflip]

Judge Doom? Wow, they really are running out of ideas. [...It's almost no fun to make a snarky aside when she's by herself. Almost. Kim speaks up-]

Look here, crypt keeper, you are so not getting away with this.

[She's positive of that. The others will be here. Soon.]

[misplacesfriends]

[Exactly this icon. This is his expression.]

You want us to what?

No! [God, the thought of killing anyone... Kinda makes him feel sick to his stomach again.] What makes you think that murder is any way to even the scales on whatever crime we committed? [His only crime...? Probably just...going AWOL, aiding a prisoner in escape...stolen vehicle. Destruction of said vehicle. Okay. So. He's got a lot of "normal" crimes attached to him.]

[hitontheheadasachild]

What?

[Anna stares, eyes wide.]

No. No, absolutely...! Absolutely not!

[defyingfrigidity]

[If there could be anything for Elsa to say when this guy walks out, it's immediately forgotten as he begins to speak, because wow does a wave of guilt wash over her when he mentions all of them being guilty of a crime. It's been a while since her coronation, and more interaction with her people helped to cut away at that guilt, but... she still almost damned her entire kingdom to an eternal winter. And that's not even getting into the horrible injuries she gave Anna, how she almost killed the Duke of Weselton's guards...

... Of course, what he says after that jars Elsa right out of that spiral of beating herself up. Good.... job...?]

Wh-- that's ridiculous! How can you expect anyone to just... kill another person??? [It's true, she almost did, but she was so utterly terrified and horrified over nearly doing that... she can't understand how anyone could just do something like that.] And how would that help us to stop feeling guilty?

[thedukeofficial]

Dis-honorable, huh?

[ He is just gonna sliiiiiiide up here, patently ignoring that murder part. ]

That wouldn't happen to mean you accept... extra-legal monetary incentives, would it? I happen to be a man of great... let's call it wealth and taste.

[whistlenotchirp]

[Oh, a judge! Finally someone reliable and lawful to settle this whole matter fair and square. Sure, the cloak is... rather morbid, but judges need to be serious people. Yes, soon this would all be-

Oh.

Well then. I guess he's going to hop as close to the Judge as he's allowed to, pointing his finger angrily.]

N-Now wait just a darn hopping minute! What kind of a circus is this?!

[sevenvaginas]

[glances around, tentatively raises hand, but then just immediately blurts out her question rending all of that moot.]

Hi, Mister Judge? What if we don't do that? Is that okay, too?

[theskymeetsthesea]

[Well, this is just great. Everything is weird and off and this guy is giving her the creeps, and talking about murdering people.]

Listen here, Doom Man. I am Moana of Motunui, I sailed across the sea and returned the heart of Te Fiti, and I refuse to let you hurt anyone.

[lottesof]

Daddy will not be happy with this! [ok, pink malfoy.]

[terribibble]

[So. Fiddleford was already in a very bad way when he showed up. His bad way has got markedly worse the longer he's been awake, and by the time the Judge finishes his introductory speech it has ascended from being a bad way to being the worst way imaginable. It's too much to process. Not the idea that he's committed a crime -- he's been doing Good, he knows that, but he's well-aware that his methods might read as a little extreme to some folks who don't have their priorities straight. Like his ex-wife. And that's fine.

It's just he's never killed anyone.

He thinks. There were still some people in the hospital thanks to the Homicdal Pterodactyl-tron last he checked, but they were all still alive. So it's fine. It's fine it's fine it's fine. It's]

What's -- what d'you mean, dipped?

[He can't even begin to address the rest of it. Start small.]

[prismbloom]

"Crimes"...?

[ ... He can't know that for certain, can he? Aqua's stomach feels sour, and she very much does not like this. Even more than before. She waits until he's finished with his self-satisfying speech. ]

You call yourself a judge, and yet you expect us to murder one another? I don't think so.

[kindaruledatit]

[Oh, dang. Maybe stealing that cop car was finally catching up to her.]

Whoa, dude. Hang on, aren't prisons supposed to be all like, rehabilitation and junk? You can't just tell us we should kill each other!

[just_as_planned]

And I thought Demona sounded cliche. You know, ordinarily time off of sentences is rewarded for good behavior, not engaging in acts of senseless violence.

[pardonmylanguage]

Soooooo...no one other than us is here, right? Our family and friends are still out there?

[trashcubes]

[This man is scary. Very, very scary.

WALL-E would like to retract to cube form, but he shakily manages to raise his fucking hand like a good little robot because he is confused and would like to know why he got labeled a criminal, thanks]

[missingache]

[So, first of all, this guy is creepy. Second of all? Crime? What crime?]

I'm no criminal!

[As far as Roxas knows he's not.] And why would any of us kill anyone here?!

[returntodarkness]

[ A man who has been utterly quiet and sticking to the shadows up until this point starts just. Laughing. Like this is the most amusing thing in the world. ]

And what if we have no guilty conscience? Not all of us are the kind who feel such... Unnecessary emotions. It is quite amusing, really, that you used those words exactly.

[ ...Maybe Judge Doom didn't expect to have someone like Ansem here, honestly. Who is bad right down to his solid black core and non-existent heart. ]