WEEK 3

[grimgrinningghosts]

[Well finally deaths are starting to happen in this hell park, and for the amount of shitposting this round is, I'll admit I'm pleasently surprised to see how determined people are to make sure this doesn't happen again.

... Not that it'll matter of course, but it's the thought that counts.

Still, once you wake up on Saturday, you'll find that a new land has opened up! It... sure is a new land, at least?]

23 Guest Remaining

[SATURDAY SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY]

{Don't forget to fill in this week's activity check!}

Comments

[studentbody]

Okay, but like. Hypothetically speaking. How does it work.

[She's. Not getting the hint.]

[udderly]

When a human and a cow cover each other very much, they get down and dirty with it. [He's using origami Kubo gave him to illustrate this. Sorry, Kubo.] Probably in some worlds, a baby could happen there but if that's what you'reasking about I would definitely ask Beth. She'd be in the know about all the weird science-y stuff behind how a cow can get a human pregnant.

[All of these sentences are Bad.]

[studentbody]

Ohhhhh. So I should ask Beth? Has she gotten it on with a cow? Because no offense or anything, but I thought she was a—

[leans in REALLY CLOSE and stage-whispers:]

LESBIAN.

[udderly]

[He's going to say something about how he's pretty sure Beth is an alien and therefore it's rude to prescribe human sexuality norms to her? But also that just feels like a lot of effort? He doesn't want to deal with? So.]

. . . I mean, by human standards, I'm pretty sure doing the horizontal mambo with a cow qualifies you as some kinda queer.

[He probably should mention he doesn't know if Beth has ever fucked a cow? But nah.]

[studentbody]

Oh. So Sarah Lynn is a queer.

[She's just. Jotting that down in her little notebook, there, good to know.]

That's super helpful, thank you so much.

[udderly]

[There is . . . probably some miscommunication going on here? And he should probably try and correct it? But also that's a problem for future Otis.]

Why do you want to know any of this, anyway? I'm not into Gandhi.

[JUST PUTTING THAT OUT THERE. HE IS NOT GONNA FUCK GANDHI.]

[studentbody]

Ew, why would anyone be? He's like a little bald baby. Like, I think the actual baby was more bangable than Gandhi.

[Cleo don't say that???

She shrugs.]

I'd just never thought about it before. It's like...frowned-upon in most places, I think.

[udderly]

I'm just saying! He's, like, your friend or something isn't he? [???? HE'S PRETTY SURE THEY'RE FRIENDS] Anyway, that's a human thing - well, it's more like a "animals probably don't talk to humans in most places because humans get really weird about that" thing.

[studentbody]

Uh, no. He's, like, super weird and poor?

[Never mind the fact that they literally grew up as foster siblings for fifteen years. It's fine.]

But, hey, good on you for being open-minded. I flirted with a puppy once and people were so rude about it?

[udderly]

[ladydoingmath.jpg]

. . . But don't you guys, like, know each other?

[He's just ignoring the second half because he's so stuck on this.]

[studentbody]

Yeah, but like. Don't tell anyone.

[she leans in close again. too close.]

He has ADD. It's super contagious.

[udderly]

[He's pretty sure that's not how it works? But he's more concerned with backing away slightly.]

Oh, wow. That's super terrible for him.

[studentbody]

Right? I don't think he even gets how, like, totally dire it is. They brought in some lame public speaker to tell us all about how it's "not contagious" but I don't buy it.

[udderly]

Wait. He can't, like, die of it or anything right? [Suddenly he's mildly concerned.] Because that would suck.

[studentbody]

Oh, yeah, I heard it's totally fatal.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯]

[udderly]

. . . Do you think if he dies and nobody kills him, we'd all get the prize?

[Inquiring minds want to know.]

[studentbody]

...Huh. I dunno. The baby died and we're all still here, right?

[udderly]

Yeah, but the ugly Green Goblin killed the baby. And technically, he got the prize.

[studentbody]

I guess. Still stupid, though.

...Guess we should just wait for Gandhi to drop dead of natural causes, then!

[udderly]

I mean, the first best option is to actually get out of here but like. I don't think that's a bad second option.

[studentbody]

Perfect. So my plan is the best, as per usual! Great!

[Claps! Yay for Cleo!]