Week 1

[grimgrinningghosts]

[Well that was a busy day, huh? But despite all that, a good majority of you are reasonable people, and are smart enough to find an escape without resorting to deadly violence. Maybe if you put your heads together, you'll find a way to get out of here! After all, the host is practically in shambles already, what can he do?

The whole first floor of the manor is open for your leasure now, with the only change being that there's now a set of rules in the foyer hanging on the wall.

Let the games begin.]

[MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY]

Comments

[bestchefinparis]

[Like half of Paris and the residents of this place, apparently. Rémy doesn't seem very amused about that reply]

Thank you for the news. That's a no?

[stanbyme]

Well, I've eaten more unsanitary things. But there's kids here.

[bestchefinparis]

I washed my paws, if that's what you're worried about.

[And several children already came to try what he cooked, but he doesn't mention that, just in case. Humans naturally dislike rats in kitchens, he knows that]

[stanbyme]

[Squint.]

You do this a lot, do ya?

[bestchefinparis]

It's what I do everyday -- I'm a chef in a bistro.

[He sounds so proud of that]

Humans seem to like the novelty of a cooking rat at first, but most of them keep coming back because of the quality.

[stanbyme]

That right?

[He pulls up a chair and gets comfy.]

Then show me what you got, big shot.

[bestchefinparis]

You got it!

[Not going to back down! What'd this guy like? Well better give him a metaphorical punch, he figures, and hit him with something flavorful. Spicy, perhaps?

Rémy does know what he's doing, that much is obvious. Despite his size, he can actually use a skillet, and the knives are handled rather well. Despite using common ingredients, it's actually pretty good!]

There you go, try it! It's not half-bad, if I may say that myself.

[Almost wants to try it himself, but this is not for him, this is for Stan]

[stanbyme]

[With that kind of prep time, not even the novelty of a cooking rat is enough to keep him watching forever. Eventually he's gonna lean back and rest his eyes for a minute, occasionally scratching at his gut.

He hates to admit it, but it smells pretty damn good. By the time it's ready, his stomach gives a hearty rumble.]

Not bad, small fry. Where'd you learn to cook like this?

[bestchefinparis]

I had to teach myself. Watching TV, mostly.

[Which went pretty well, all things considered]

It took some time before I was let into a kitchen without someone trying to kill me, that was months ago. I have been working since then.

[stanbyme]

No kiddin'.

[Color him impressed.]

Shows me for almost turning down a free meal.

[bestchefinparis]

I can't blame you, you're not the first one to not trust a rat touching someone's food.

[At least Rémy sounds sincere about not holding any resentment about that]

[stanbyme]

Yeah? Must be rough.

[He holds out his pinky finger to shake.]

Stan Pines, nice ta meetcha.

[bestchefinparis]

[Right, the human custom of a handshake. Better try to move that finger up and down -- and kinda managing to, at least]

Rémy! Rémy...uh... [No last name. Everyone keeps saying their last names and it feels inadequate to not add anything else. Since he wants to give a good impression he blurts the very first thing he can think of adding] ...from Paris!

[stanbyme]

[Stan offers a little bit of shaking, as much as you can shake hands with your pinky anyway.]

Ahh yeah, Paris. I been there once, back in the seventies.

[bestchefinparis]

The...seventies?

[That's like ancient history for a rat. What, ten generations back? He can't even imagine how things were back then]

[stanbyme]

Hey, some of us old guys used to be young guys once. All the way back in... [He pauses, but when the year doesn't come easy to him he makes a whuff sound.] Ah, well, the year ain't important anyway.